Last week we looked at two principles for developing close spiritual friends: bearing each other’s burdens and using spiritual gifts. This post looks at two more. Remember, these principles apply one-on-one or in a group.
The next principle is intentionally building one another up to be more like Christ. I Cor. 14:26 states: “Let all things be done to build each other up.” Eph. 4:12-13 explains that God gave different types of people to the church “for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain . . . to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.”
Think about how helpful it would be to have spiritual friends who consistently encouraged you to become more like Christ. How much strength would it give you to have someone speak words to help you be more like Christ in specific situations in your life? Those who have such friends testify that it makes a huge difference in their lives. Whether we are a new Christian or have been a pastor for 30 years, we still need peers to spur us on. I think people really do want this, but it is hard to make it happen. This means you will have to be intentional. Start asking around and see who is interested, even if it is just one person.
“Consider how your spirit would be lifted if there were one or two people to encourage you to persevere and to remind you of what God has already done in your life and how you have grown.”
Closely related to this is the next principle of encouragement. I Thess 5:11 instructs us to “encourage each other and build each other up.” (ESV) Encouragement is implied in building up others, but it also applies to healing hearts. Everyone goes through difficult times, and it is easy to lose our perspective and focus. We might lose our job, fail a test, run into bad health, feel powerless against our faults, or find ourselves in relationship conflicts. Consider how your spirit would be lifted if there were one or two people to encourage you to persevere and to remind you of what God has already done in your life and how you have grown.
Even better, spiritual friends could sit with you, ask God for guidance and wait for his voice. Where believers are gathered in Christ’s name, he is there (Mt. 18:20), and he wants to help. Consider how you would be encouraged if your spiritual friends discerned the same leading from God that you thought you were hearing from God yourself! Or if one of your friends went through a similar problem they could “comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God” II Cor. 1:4 (ESV). So let’s find friends who will encourage us and whom we can encourage. We all need it and want it.
How many spiritual friends do you have who try to build you up and encourage you? How can you find friends like this?